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Have a New Kid by Friday - Thursday & Friday

2/14/10

Have a New Kid by Friday - Thursday & Friday

Do we have that new kid yet? It's already Friday! No, not yet but it is a work in progress. The Thursday chapter covers the differences between "feeling good" and "true self-worth." Key words to focus on are Acceptance, Belonging and Competence! Parents should focus on the action of the child in order to give positive encouragement rather than how "good" they are. It's really just shifting your vocabulary for example "oh you are such a good boy for making an A on your math test!" Instead Dr. Leman suggests "An A on your math test? Fantastic! You must have really studied hard for that test." Make sense? Does your child feel like they belong in your family? Do they have a sense of membership? We have the "Team Kramer" mantra. My husband and I are constantly using that reference to help our children understand what our family believes in. Do you want your children to be competent? Give them responsibility. Our guy plays soccer and since this is an extra activity he should be the one to gather his stuff and have it ready for practice or games. Simple enough, right?
Friday's chapter is an overview of the previous four chapters.
Here is his top 10 list of what it takes to get the results you want.
10. Be 100% consistent in your behavior.
9. Always follow through on what you say you will do.
8. Respond, don't react.
7. Count to 10 and ask yourself, "What would my old self do in this situation? What should the new me do?"
6. Never threaten your kids.
5. Never get angry.
4. Don't give any warnings.
3. Ask yourself, "Whose problem is this?"
2. Don't think the misbehavior will go away.
1. Keep a happy face on, even when you don't want to...do something else.

Which of these would you have difficulty doing?

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