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Have a New Kid by Friday - Tuesday

1/19/10

Have a New Kid by Friday - Tuesday


This week I'm covering chapter 2 which is called Tuesday. If you need to catch up you can click here. Monday we covered the idea of parents sticking to their guns and being consistent. Tuesday discusses the ABC's (attitude, behavior character) of long term concerns of parents. When it comes to attitude who is your child more like? The child who is most like you is the one your going to butt heads with the most. Dr. Leman says, "the key to changing your child is changing your attitude." Is it really just a phase? Careful of what you dismiss! Is it a phase or being disrespectful. Are you making a mountain out of a molehill? There is a quiz in the book. Just ask yourself, What is the purposive nature of the behavior? How do you, as the parent, feel in this situation? Is this a mountain or a molehill? He has three steps for success when it comes to building your child's character. 1. Let reality be the teacher - this can be one of the hardest because most adults can already see the outcome. As parents we want to protect our children, even if at times it's from themselves. 2. Learn to respond rather than react - GUILTY!!!! I'm terrible at this and I'm going to have to read the difference over and over. The example is - If the doctor says, "You responded to your medications," that's good. If the docter says, "You reacted to your medication," that's bad. He goes on to talk about a child wanting a pony. Instead of stating the obvious, "You can't have a pony our house is to small, it costs too much to feed it," etc... basically bursting the bubble. Instead he suggests you to get on their level and dream with them! He suggest saying something like, "Yea, I wish I could have a pony too! That would be so cool." 3.) B doesn't happen until A is completed. If your child hasn't done what you have asked then you don't move on to the next event until they do. This is a huge challenge because if you're in a time crunch this could get ugly. You are going to have to really stand your ground on this one. I have to admit that for the last two days my older son is finally getting it. He hasn't gotten in trouble at all. I haven't had to repeat myself over and over it's been much more pleasant.

What should you start doing this week?
1. What is your attitude toward your kids?
2. How does your behavior reveal your attitude?
3. What changes do you need to make in your behavior toward your children?
4. What kind of character do you want to be known for? How can you get there?

Talk about an intense chapter! This takes LOTS of practice. It really is about stepping outside of the rush of your day, grabbing some patience and getting on your own child's level. This book is really about how to have a new you by Friday! - lol


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